


Finders Keepers

by larkscape



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Cat POV, Cats, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Yuri Plisetsky has come up with the edgiest edgelord cat name ever created
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-20
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-11-16 10:24:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11251218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/larkscape/pseuds/larkscape
Summary: His name is Puma Tiger Scorpion the Great and he is the Emperor of the Plisetsky and Baranovskaya households.





	Finders Keepers

**Author's Note:**

> In honor of [the article](http://doumekichikara.tumblr.com/post/162007804527/i-am-delighted) which gave us the delightful full name of Yuri's cat. Yuri Plisetsky is 2edgy4u. Puma Tiger Scorpion is the Best Cat. The author is caught in an eternal gigglefit.

His name is Puma Tiger Scorpion the Great and he is the Emperor of the Plisetsky and Baranovskaya households. His rule is far-reaching, his empire vast and noble. He allows the humans to sleep secure in his beds, to sit in comfort upon his sofas, to stock his kitchens and dine at his tables. Let no one say that he is an unjust ruler to his subjects. The sacrifices he makes for his people are almost unending and the recompense he demands is modest — a bit of liver, a crinkly ball of paper, a glass dish kept full of the choicest morsels.

Some things, though, an emperor must claim for himself. This particular diversion is most satisfactory: the long ribbon on the end of his new toy makes delightful fluttering curves when he bats at it, and the heavy disk weighing down one end keeps it from straying too far when he gets a bit overexcited.

Yuri, the best bed-warmer in the lands, takes exception to the Emperor’s chosen amusement.

“Potya, don’t play with that!” Yuri roars.

Puma Tiger Scorpion the Great ignores him. Doesn’t Yuri know that every item in this palace belongs to the Emperor and that the humans are only given leave to use them by his generous grace? He bats at the ribbon again, then has to leap up and capture it with both paws when it makes to escape. A sound application of teeth should convey the proper lesson; toys must obey the will of the Emperor. There is no reprieve granted to recalcitrant ribbons.

“I'm serious, Potya! Oh my god, you are such a fucking _cat_ — that’s my gold medal, you asshole!”


End file.
